This is a scary week for me and it's a week I have been dreading for some time. And because of this I've almost had a month of sleepless nights just thinking about it.
This week is the week where I start my second draft of my first fiction book.
And no thought terrifies me more.
Gone are the days where I wrote my first two non fiction books and sailed through each process without a cloud on the horizon. Gone are the days where my confidence bloomed at the thought of writing more books. Writing is really simple, eh? All you have to do is think up a plotline and write it down. Once you have that sorted everything else will follow, right?
No?
Oh help.
Writing my current book has only proved one thing. That I have a strange vivid delusion that I am a good writer. I mean people have raved about my first two books and posted 5/4 reviews about them so surely this will boost my confidence when I need it the most. But no sadly not.
When authors write their first book what on earth goes on inside their minds? I mean you read it and re-read it like several million times but how do you know if what you've written is actually any good? Who tells you that apart from one or two potential beta readers? And how do you know whether to trust their opinion? For all you know they might have just had a wild night out on the town or just returned from laser eye surgery.
So I guess I'm just feeling a little overwhelmed at the moment. I have my first draft out in front of me but no idea where to start with my second. Character development, plotline and pacing are a few things whizzing round at the front of my very fragile brain right now but the first thing I need to do is take a deep breath and calm down.
So, tell me - how do you feel when you get to this stage? And how do you tell if your book is any good? Do you re-read it several times like I have done to look for obvious errors or do you just plunge straight into the second draft?
LK, all you have to is keep writing, rewriting, rewriting, in other words, edit until it is perfect in your sight, the rest is up to the publisher and the readers, most importantly. Good luck. Kharis Macey
ReplyDeleteHi Kharis,
ReplyDeleteYes, that is now what I have decided to do. I feel so much better about things now and you'll be pleased to know I have spent all morning working :)
Thanks for commenting!
FWIW, I can so relate to this post. After four and a half years of writing I'm finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. My third draft is nearly finished and once the editing is completed, I'll send the work to five betas for review. So far, I've received positive feedback about the excerpts I've submitted to contests, etc. Yet, despite the accolades, I still doubt myself, often questioning whether my writing journey will end with a career as an author or send me further on down the path paved by the literary wannabes who came before me. Only time will tell.
ReplyDeleteI guess what I'm trying to tell you here is you're not alone. Hope runs eternal. Keep trying and never give up hope.
Hi Andrea,
DeleteThanks for the comment. You've made me feel better about things. Writing is a lonely business but as you say it's comments like these that make me realise I'm not alone. You'll also be pleased to hear that I've now made a cracking start on my 2nd draft. I know it will be worth it once I publish it :)
If you don't have doubts about your book you would probably be so overbearing, over-confident and so into yourself, that the book would be completely unreadable to anybody else
ReplyDeleteI so know what you mean there, Richard. It's a good job then I'm so over critical! ;)
DeleteHi LK,
ReplyDeleteI guess you know by now that you're not alone, and I see by your reply to a comment above that you've now plunged into your second draft, so congratulations. I am 300 pages into my third novel now and have been going through the same self-doubts. I look back at my first book and wonder where it came from. I think it was great, and I remember thinking that even when I was writing it. And although it hasn't sold well or received many reviews, the ones it has gotten from total strangers are very positive - "gripping story" "best horror they've read" "really well-developed characters" and such. So now I know that book was good because complete strangers have bought it and said so after reading. My second book I wasn't so sure of. I thought some parts were great, others not so much, and still others really flawed. But in the end I realized that nothing is perfect. What's that any way? In my mind something might be perfect and yet in the minds of all others it might be terrible. Perfect doesn't exist in writing or other works of art, it's too subjective a thing to rely on or try to aspire to. It's ethereal. In the end you have to stop worrying about what other people think and what you yourself think and go with what you feel - go with your imagination's gut so to speak. I think that's how my first book turned out so well, I wasn't so worried about whether it was or not, I just knew I enjoyed the characters and cared about what happened to them. I loved the characters in me second book too but I let the worry get to me a bit too much. I love the woman and her daughters in my current book, but I'm really fretting over this one and it's holding me back. Somehow reading your blog has lit that light bulb in my brain and helped me along a little. I remember now that I've just got to go with it and stop the worrying. Thank you!
Robert Shaw
Hi Robert,
DeleteI'm glad my blog has helped you. I guess we've just got to ignore the fear and keep on writing!
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ReplyDeleteDear LK,
ReplyDeletePondering the same question over and over I finally found a solution by hiring test readers at craigslist. In fact I describe the whole process in the foreword to my ebook Naked Determination. This story found it's way into my book because it ended on a great note. Since this story is in the foreword you can pull the free sample at Amazon and read it. LOL
Hi Gisela,
DeleteThat's a good idea. Did you find anyone suitable at Craigslist?
Yours is a question that will recur every day of your writing life: we none of us understand what we have, or do not have, in the way of talent - if the gift is in us, or we are merely hacks. Every time you try a new sentence form, every time you suppress the pace to enhance the drama of the moment you will ask the question of yourself. How can you even edit if you do not?
ReplyDeleteOne thing I think I have learned: return to your work. Not in a week or even a month but in six months or a year. If it reads as well or better to you then than it did when you wrote it, you've got it about right. That doesn't mean you won't want to alter small passages, change the balance in some sentences, no. But if you catch yourself turning your own pages with the enthusiasm of a reader, you've got a good book.
Hi Bill,
DeleteI know a lot of writers who leave their work like that for that amount of time. I guess it pays to be patient.
It depends on what you term 'good'. If I enjoy reading it and it takes me to a new place I'd not before imagined then it's good enough for me. If I enjoy it, my dad insists, somebody else will.
ReplyDeleteHi Scott,
ReplyDeleteYes, that is very true. I'll remember that.